Skittles: Our First Fight

“You’ve had enough,” I playfully tugged the bag of Skittles out of Elisha’s hand, and sat back on the pillows to finish our movie.

“What was that about?”

I glanced over, shocked to see Elisha’s mortified face. What on earth was wrong?

“Katie, give me back my skittles.”

“Are you kidding? You’ve already had more than me, and I’ve had 11! I don’t want us to get sick on our honeymoon,” I laughed. But one look at Elisha’s incredulous brown eyes made my smile freeze . . . this was no joke. He seriously wanted more skittles!

“I can’t believe you are doing this right now.” I shook my head and handed the bag over.

“I’m just going to finish the bag.”

“Finish it!?!?! The entire bag?!?!”

My mind was blown. Who had I married?

Elisha’s ran his fingers through his hair incredulously, “What. Is. Your problem, Katie?” 


Yes, I know you’re thinking I’m the crazy one right now . . . because since that eye-opening day of our honeymoon, I have come to understand that most people see an entire pack of skittles as a single serving size. (Although I still struggle accepting this social norm.)

But before you point a finger, look at my perspective.

For my family, a pack of skittles was two serving sizes for my whole family . . . of 11 kids. We would get two–three if we were lucky–then the pack was back up in the cupboard for next weekend’s treat.

Skittles were a treat. Not a meal.

I thought I was splurging having 11 Skittles (I mean, it was my honeymoon, after all). And my husband thought I was weird to actually count them.

How many times do you and your friend, your husband, or your boss, react because you have a different belief you didn’t even realize you formed?

 Expectation is the mother of frustration.

Elisha and I had the same foundational beliefs about families, homeschooling, serving Jesus, business, lifestyle . . . but Skittles? Didn’t see that one coming.

Every time I now see that colorful candy, it’s a reminder to try and see from my husband’s perspective. Just because I grew up rationing Skittles, doesn’t mean the rest of the world views sugar the same way.

The Kathryn Joy

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14 thoughts on “Skittles: Our First Fight

  1. Haha! I can relate to this in my own way. I mean, I remember thinking other people were evil if they didn’t do what my family did. *face palm*

  2. Firstborn are the rule makers, middle children rule breakers… As for the last born… We are pirates and anarchists so the so called rules codes and laws are all more like “guidelines”…

  3. Good thoughts on so many levels! I’ve had similar experiences, just not with skittles. 🙂
    And expectations are the mother of frustrations….Yes! So true. Love your little stories. Keep it up!

    1. Amen, Sherri! Compromise has been the name of the game this year as Elisha and I discover more and more of our differences. They make for some fun laughs later (and some we can laugh at in the moment). 😉

  4. Ha! So funny. Being the youngest child by 9 years, I was like an only child. I didn’t share my bag of chips well. One of our early silly arguments. Plus I had expectations based on how my family always did things and they didn’t ever apply in Kevin’s world. So funny how we learn about each other.

    1. That’s great! Elisha is feeling super generous when he shares his barbecue chips with me. I can touch any of the other chips, but the barbecue ones . . . 😉 . It’s a fun journey!

  5. My husband inhales candy. I have never seen the likes. He says some day he may get diabetes, but until then, he will enjoy his candy. Skittles are one of his very favorite.
    I laughed when I read this post, and read part of it to my husband.
    I have long ago decided I will not choose to make sugar an argument point in our marriage. We are on our 14th year of marriage, and I still am making many cookies, and sometimes pies. He still eats candy like it’s meat and potatoes. No, wait, I’m sure he eats more candy while he is watching a movie than he eats potatoes and meat at a meal. I have received many comments from wives because I don’t say a thing, but my husband feels sorry for the husbands whose wife tries to ration the sugar!
    My sister just told me about your YouTube videos. I am so much enjoying your videos and blog. Your post to the girl who is afraid to write came quite close to me, as I now have a book in the design stage at the publishers.
    I also so much want to encourage moms. (We had three children in two months less than three years, and I want to pass on encouragement I wish I would have had. Authentic, true encouragement that encourages, not makes moms feel overwhelmed.) I am not on social media any more, but I do use my WhatsApp statuses to encourage.

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